I feel as though I have had a hard time with trust within my life. Anyone I may know I will give them 100% of my trust until they show me that they can no longer. I delivered information to what I thought would be trustful people in a time of impulse and just plain stress and information that I told them I always wanted them to keep to themselves and absorb it in. I should completely know better knowing that in this situation I know the consequences and what ended up happening. I am now faced with my choices and the repercussions that effect an important person in my life currently. Her impact is defiantly greater than I have ever imagined, let alone her guidance is nothing I have ever experienced in my life. I certainly find that I need to be able to trust within her much more than when she did trust within me. Since these occurrences she no longer trusts me and from now on I will be forever be striving to get back to the place that we started. I have never felt this sort of appreciation or actual caring from someone in my life no matter who it may be, and I think it means more to me that it is not someone in my family but rather outside of that who actually stood up for me in times where she hardly knows me or when others would tell her not to. It makes me anxious that I never took this into effect when realizing what I was doing or even what it was actually about. I feel like i took 50 steps backward into a person that I was in the sense of being a younger teenager and unaware of actions have consequences. I am defiantly at the age where I know right from wrong and that I am subconscious of what I am actually saying or verbalizing. This will be with me for a wright of learning and a time to grow and learn to move past and conquer. But when these sorts of things happen to me, I find they forever burn a hole in my heart.
On a lighter note, here is a layout for the day.
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